Proof

Finally...

So, with the handing out of our new shirts this morning, our logo was officially unveiled. Though it was wonderfully rendered by a good friend's dad, from a design found by Eve, I know it's not incredibly creative. But the heart, the fire, and the wings are all images that are meaningful to what we are and what we do. Plus, it looks both pretty, and slightly gangsta.

There was, however, a noticeable dearth of comments or questions about the tagline on the back: "I will be proof."

Months ago, when just a few of you were running with me, and really, keeping me running and from crawling into a hole well-stocked with various beers and Tex-Mex entrees, it was hard to separate the act of running from recent events, and the loss of a community that I had made so much a part of my life.

There was sadness, and some runs were fueled by mixes of anger and a desire to leave everything behind me, and over the music in my iPod, I could hear Eddie Vedder screaming "saw things so much clearer, once you were in my rearview mirror."

Thinking about what was began to shift into thinking about what could have been, and that into what could be. I had an initial idea to call the group Mettle, and I envisioned posters advertising us, saying, "Prove Yourself." Mettle just didn't sound right, even though it captured what I think is important about what we do as runners.

But the idea of this as a vehicle for us to prove ourselves stuck. It's hardly a novel idea, but I think people lose sight of what makes running a noble endeavor that can resonate throughout our lives - the fact that no matter what level we're at, we are testing ourselves, and putting ourselves in situations that will require us to answer some very fundamental questions about who we are, and whether our belief in our better selves is stronger than pain and inconvenience.

Every time you make the choice to get out and run, you have proven something about yourself. Any time you choose the harder path, because it has a heart, you're proving something about yourself. If we can make these choices when we're running, then hopefully, we'll see it's not about a race, or being tough or macho or athletic - it's about our willingness to do the hard things because they have a real value, and because they say something about who we are. If we realize that, then hopefully, we do the same things in the rest of our lives. If we're willing to run the literal extra miles, maybe we'll be willing to go the figurative extra miles to help someone out, or do the right thing for others or ourselves, even though it's not easy or comfortable or the most profitable, because on any given day, over and over, we are faced with the chances to be proof, of ourselves, and of what we claim to believe in.

That kind of proof is first and foremost for ourselves, not for the judgement of everyone around us. But insofar as we live among people who will question and judge our character, then yes, we want our actions to be proof for them, as well.

Recently, I had a meeting with someone who had been a very prominent figure in my previous incarnation as a coach and as a runner, someone who first hired me to coach, and who taught me a good deal about how to be an effective coach, something I remain thankful for. He questioned a lot about what I'm doing, as a person, and as a coach, but he kept repeating, "Well, the proof will be in the pudding," which almost made me laugh, because in one stroke, it referenced my personal blog, and my focus on proof.

I do worry a little that people will see our shirts and think that this is all about proving a point to him, and to some other people. Whatever. I'm quickly re-learning that people are going to think what they want, and it just doesn't matter.

The truth is all that matters, and one way or the other, we will shape the truth of who we are, individually, and as a team. I promise you I'll continue working hard to do that as a coach. Today, and tomorrow, and for the next five months, and on race day, and the days and years after that, you will be proof, I will be proof, and Team Spiridon will be proof, of ourselves, and of the things that are important. That's what I want us all to commit to, and that's all that really matters.

Sorry to be preachy. But this is important. So, let's hear it in the comments - what do you want to be proof of?